Mom vs. the Dot: Making it COUNT!

Thanksgiving Checklist: Baked pies (or bought them at Eat N Park). Check. Made the side dish, Check. Now you are getting ready to head out the door to the family Thanksgiving. Do you dread getting together with your family? I wouldn't say I exactly dread interactions with my extended family.  I am leery of going, however.  You never know when a relative will say something completely inappropriate, awkward, or just plain rude.  You may be anticipating family friction or an encounter with someone who has a grudge against you. And of course there is always the possibility of being judged. So, Thanksgiving isn't so much about food...it's about survival.  Instincts.  When to respond and when not to.  Who is safe to talk to and who to avoid. Why is it like this?  Why can't it be simple like the Peanuts gang singing, "Over the River and Through the Woods?"  Then enjoying a turkey dinner and pie, and going home happy? I think the family...

Do you know what our society has produced?  A generation of self-centered youth who have no desire to take care of themselves, no desire to succeed.  No ambition to work or start their own businesses or have their own place to live. I remember it being a thrill to live in my own place for the first time.  I had my first real job, and split the rent with a friend from college.  That place was a dump!  But it was our dump.   Ok - it wasn't this bad, but you know what I mean.  Did you ever live in such a place?  Ah, the starter home! Weird 70's green, yellow, and orange shag carpet, along with that fake dark wood paneling and uneven floors. That tiny house was undesirable to everyone except us.  The newbies to the adult world.  Living on our own and loving it.  I loved putting my bi-weekly paycheck in the bank and shopping for groceries each week.  Discount groceries.  I remember saving ju...

After changing diapers for roughly 7 years, we are ready to be done. My 3-year-old boy has master the #1, but #2's are just not happening unless he's wearing a diaper.  So I thought I'd try what my friends have had success with: Explain that mommy and daddy are tired of changing stinky, dirty diapers. Now it is the toddler's turn.  Place toddler in tub and allow them to change their own diaper. This is supposed to be offensive enough to them that they quickly change their mind and do their business on the potty from here on out. OK... So we are on day six of my darling son's adventure in changing his own diaper. It's not going well. He takes it off, starts whining and complaining and holding his nose. So far so good. "Okay - here are the wipes.  Clean yourself up," I say. And then he refuses.  "I can't do it." "I'm tired of changing dirty diapers!" He tells me. Sigh. A three-year-old shouldn...

Thanksgiving Day is upon us...or it will be in a few days. We love to watch the Peanuts Thanksgiving videos - what a cute little group of Pilgrims!  The children all survived the trip and outlived many of the adults that first winter.  They had to perform chores and tasks that kept the colony alive while the adults were ailing.  They were amazing! Then there are my children, who can't survive without technology for 5 minutes... When I think about pioneer families - they obviously survived without iPads...but that was just it.  They were geared toward survival.  Oh yeah - and there was no electricity.  In today's culture, children don't have to tote water, chop and haul firewood, or feed the livestock twice a day.  In fact, they have very few responsibilities.  Moreover, we moms and dads have added extra work to our loads so our beloved children can participate in sports, art programs, or whatever area we think they might ex...

 Earlier this month, I came across a story I knew I had to share with you:  "There is a church in England that has no lights.  Many people who visit the church are shocked that the architect left out something as important as overhead lighting.  But the architect had a plan.  The various families who regularly attend the church are given their own pew, as well as a lamp and a book.  When a family comes to church, their lamp is lit.  If they are not in church, the pew is dark. (Here are a few pics of St. Peter's Chapel in Bradwell, England, to give you an idea of what the church might look like.  I researched online and could not find the specific church mentioned in the article.) What difference can one darkened pew make?  Not much, you might think.  But what if several pews were lacking lamps?  Then the whole church would be affected.  It's obvious.  If all are present and in their pews, the church is al...

  A man and his wife bought a cabin at a lake.  They had almost reached retirement, so this was their plan.  They would spend weekends there, fishing and relaxing.  Rocking on the porch and watching the sunset. One weekend, the husband decided to go up early, hoping to get a "head start" on fishing.  His wife would join him after she was done with work.  When she arrived, his car was parked near the cabin, but he was no where to be seen.  After a thorough search of the cabin, the dock, and scanning the lake, he was still absent.  She waited for an hour or two to see if he had gone on a hike in the woods.  No hiker returned that day. For days, weeks, and months the police and the foresters, firefighters and neighbors searched the woods.  They dragged the lake. He had completely vanished. People wondered what had happened - did he have a heart attack and fall in the lake?  There was no one there to hear hi...

Why, in this generation of the 20-30 somethings, are we doing these crazy things? Why have returned to having larger families? Why do we favor organic foods over all others? Why do so many families homeschool their children? In my opinion, from what I have observed, it is because we want to do it better . We don't want to settle for 2 1/2 children. We don't want to settle for truck loads of lab-based, over-processed, fake food. We don't want to settle for a one-size fits all education. We are done settling.  We want to do it better . We want to experience what is like to have large families, and we want to love on each child God blesses us with equally.  We want to help each child in our family to develop to their full potential.  We want them to be able to "discover themselves" in a safe, supportive environment.  We want to have as many as we can - we think children are great! We want to grow our own food - to experience the whole pr...

What does the public think of homeschool families? In the last few months, I have heard from a number of sources that we are considered elitists. My first reaction?  Why in the world would they think that?  We're just Average Joes. After further reflection, I realized: In attempt to defend our choice of schooling our children at home, many homeschool families develop a "thick skin" and defensive attitude, which may come off as: "We're better than you." I hope that my previous articles regarding homeschooling have not cast that light on us. If so, that was not my intent. In order to shed some light on our point of view and the way we represent homeschooling, I'd like to share what an average day is like for my family: After breakfast, we spend 1 1/2 hours doing schoolwork.  My daughter works diligently at her reading, writing, spelling and math.  My preschoolers watch videos and play games to learn their alphabet and numbers.  We ...

"Lord, why is it that we mothers feel embarrassed when our youngsters misbehave in public?  They are just being children, yet our cheeks burn with shame when they are less than perfect.  Then, to cover our embarrassment, we treat them unfairly or embarrass them. Forgive me when I react to my children in a less-than-loving way, Father.  You never withhold your love from me.  Grant me the wisdom and understanding to deal with problems before they get out of hand; to avoid the anger that clouds my good judgment. Childhood passes so quickly.  I don't want to spend it scolding and reprimanding.  Show me how to deal with my children in loving kindness, as you do, and to let them know how much they mean to me." I read A Mother's Daily Prayer Book on occasion for morning devotions.  I read a variety of books whenever I get the chance.  I need insight.  I need guidance.  Sometimes, they strike me just right, right where I am.  T...

The girls and I were watching a Steve Spangler science video this week, and I was inspired.  I usually am motivated by his videos to do some science experiments, and this particular one was so fun and easy, we actually did it! Screaming Balloons: Supplies: 1 bag 9-inch balloons Several 1/4" hex nuts Children The balloons were 20 for $1.00 at the Dollar Store.  The hex nuts were 3 cents a piece at our hardware store.  Doesn't get cheaper or easier than that. You simply place the hex nut in the mouth of the balloon, jiggle it to the bottom, blow it up and tie it shut.  Bada Bing, Bada Boom - you're ready for fun! Hand said balloon to nearest child and tell them to shake it.  If they can get the hex nut swirling around the inside of the balloon just so, it makes a wonderful car-revving "screaming" sound.  Lower pitch if slower, higher pitch if it is moving faster. A super easy object lesson if you are studying sound waves or motion. Okay...

Favorite Homeschool Helps for my Preschoolers? Hands Down, Our Top Three: Busy Beavers My three-year-old rambunctious boy's favorite video: Have Fun Teaching The Walking Song - great for getting up and moving!  My preschoolers love the "walk like a robot" part the best.  This gets my kids up and moving, from preschool to second grade.  It's fun, it's cool - and yes, even mom gets in on the action with this one.  They also have individual letter songs, exercise songs, social skills songs, and much more.  All set to dance music.   Super Simple Songs We have watched many of the videos from SSS - this one we discovered just today.  Immediately, my 3 and 4-year-olds were up and doing the motions right along with this little bird, or whatever he is.  Very engaging.  Cute, fun.  Can't beat these resources! They're all FREE, fun, educational, age-appropriate, and my kids love them. As for " preschool ," we use ...

In college, I earned a little income working in the cafeteria's dishwashing room, affectionately labeled "The Dish Pit" by all who worked there.  Mountains of dirty, smelly dishes would trundle through on a conveyor belt while we rinsed, sorted, and placed them on trays to be industrially cleaned.  After my shift, I would smell like everything the cafeteria had served that day.  Eeew!  Shower time. Silly me - I thought I would escape the dish pit after college. Now I have a dishpit in my house!  Breakfast...lunch...dinner...snacks.  Every time we eat, more and more dishes pile up by the sink.  Every time I cook dinner, the pots, pans, and baking sheets are stacked higher and higher.  Sometimes I feel like I'm doing dishes all day long.  Every day of the week.  Every week of the year.  It's a never-ending, rarely rewarding job, but it must be done. It must, or we will all lose our ever-loving minds...and our soft, smoot...

How many times have I (or any other homeschool mom) heard something or read something that made me wonder: Am I doing the right thing by homeschooling my children? I'm three years into the process and growing more confident each day that homeschooling is right for our family. And then... This week I spoke with a homeschool mom of seven, currently schooling the last of her children, who is in junior high.  Her summary of their experience after investing blood, sweat, tears, and years of her life?  "My older children say I've ruined their lives by homeschooling them." Ugh. We didn't have time to discuss the reasons why her children feel this way...so it left me free to imagine what went wrong, or which facets of homeschool they didn't like. The same things I wonder about on a weekly basis: Am I giving them enough social opportunities? Am I scheduling time for them to participate in big group activities?  (sports/games, choirs) Am I teachi...

When first diagnosed with this autoimmune disease, the question on my mind was, "How can I survive this?"  My own body is attacking itself and I can't do anything to stop it. After reading up about lupus on their national website, I became paranoid, depressed, and extremely worried.  I was worried I would be arthritic, have a heart attack before age 40, lose my vision, have kidney shutdown and a myriad of other problems. It reminds me of  reading the What To Expect When You're Expecting book that every woman reads when she is pregnant with her first child.  A friend of mine aptly renamed it What to Worry About When You're Expecting .  Every possible scenario for what could go wrong during pregnancy is in that book.  The reader begins to wonder which of ten or twenty symptoms she is experiencing might mean this or that awful thing could happen to her and her baby. Recalling this little factoid about pregnancy led me to make the most important first st...

The story of The Dot. My husband was teaching the youth group at our church a year or two ago, and he used an illustration that struck me.  Startled me, really. At home, he asked me to locate some rope to use for his illustration.  We had a coil of clothesline in the basement, so I brought that up.  He grabbed a black Sharpie and prepared to head out the door. "What are you doing with the rope and marker?"  I had to know. It's for an illustration tonight.  I'll tell the teens to visualize this rope running along the walls of the youth room, and all the walls of the church.  Then it continues forever - there is no end. Next, I'll have a volunteer come up and make one dot on the rope with the black marker.  This, I will explain, represents their entire time on earth.  The rope is eternity and that little black dot encompasses every moment we have here on earth. Puts things into perspective, doesn't it? I began to think of things I ...

Moms, dads - this means you! During a long-ago MOPS meeting, a mom friend spoke about being "healthy-selfish."  At the time, I was appalled.  Moms and dads who care for their children should be giving every last minute of their time to help their child grow, learn, and be well-cared for. If you've ever read any Baby Blues , you may recall a particular strip where Wanda and Darryl struggle mightily to help their baby, Zoe, appear perfect for her first baby pictures.  While wiping her off and changing her outfit multiple times, their hair becomes disheveled, spots of spitup gather on their shirts, and by the time the picture is snapped, they are exhausted. Have you been there?  I certainly have. The baby is picture perfect and content, while mom and dad are beyond exhausted. A fresh cuppa for you this morning from The Creative Mama .  My challenge for you today is this:  take an hour for yourself.  Do something you really enjoy....

 We've decided to try this.  Looks like pretty simple, science-y fun! OK - So here's the one we found on Pinterest: Walking Water Experiment by coffeecupsandcrayons.com And here's what ours looked like:   I decided to use different-sized containers for each of my kids because another friend of mine tried this experiment and said it took a loooong time for the colors to mix.  I knew my littles wouldn't wait very long, so I added my own variation to the experiment:  Our 3-year-old could not wait, so I used little medicine cups. Our 4-year-old could wait a little longer, so I used little Tupperware containers. Our 7-year-old could wait the longest, so I gave her jelly jars. Turns out, the experiment still goes through no matter what size the paper towel strips or containers are.  The fastest change was with the smallest containers, but I think the jelly jars created the most pleasant mix of colors. So there you have it!

Okay, so we need help. We know an awesome way to streamline and simplify the whole laundry process (the Duggars' genius setup), but are still stuck with our usual routine. Sometimes you just have to slam on the breaks, take a day to reset, and get that laundry machine in motion. Again. One very important thing I learned during our last move was the beauty of simplicity.  Downsizing everything to make our former house show-worthy, once it was done (a monumental task), made laundry a snap!  I think I was down to two loads a week!! So what did I do in order to cut my wash from 7 to 2 loads per week? Downsize Clothes I picked out one week's worth of season-appropriate clothes for each member of my family and stuck with that.  Because our children have grown in the last two years, their clothes are bigger.  I will allow 3 loads a week at this point. Downsize Towels One towel and washcloth per person.  One handtowel per bathroom, with one extra set of...

So there it is - the eternal, stinky, ever-growing, never-shrinking pile of dirty laundry.  If you do really well washing it one week, you may have an enormous Mount Needs-to-be-Folded.  Sigh.  And after that comes basket after basket of Put-It-All-Away, lady!  Double sigh.  What can be done?  How can we alleviate the laundry workload? Like Braveheart so aptly put it, I want "FREEDOM!"  From laundry...it is oppresive!! And yes, this is a picture of my laundry pile.  Half of this week's laundry.  Sigh. Innovative ways to decrease the laundry....hmm... We could join a nudist colony...that would really cut down on laundry.  I think my three-year-old boy would be all for it, but the rest of the family would be hard to convince.  OK - I'm not that fond of the idea...but I'm just brainstorming here. Maybe I should go with what I know. In my opinion, the best laundry setup in the history of the world belongs to Jim Bob and ...

(Here my third grade daughter is helping her brother and sister with preschool/kindergarten reading) This summer, I searched for a fun  morning routine for homeschoolers, and I was surprised that I found none.  None at all.  Hmmm... So I began to think of what I wanted for our morning routine: 1. A "good morning" song 2. Praise and worship song (super fun) 3. Occasional devotions 4. Learning songs for my preschoolers 5. Pledge of Allegiance I discovered the JOY of Youtube, and I was off to the races. Here is an example of our morning routine.  We use more or less, depending on the time we have available on a particular day. Phil Joel - "It's A Good Good Good Good Good Good Morning!" By beginning with some fast-paced dance songs, the children dance around the room and get their blood pumping.  It's kind of like gym and music class at the same time.  I try to choose songs that scroll the lyrics so my new reader can practice readi...

President Obama, in his speech given on Halloween Day in Rhode Island, said the following (during minutes 13-15): "Sometimes, someone, usually mom, leaves the workplace to stay home with the kids, which then leaves her earning a lower wage for the rest of her life as a result.   That’s not a choice we want Americans to make.” When exactly did all Americans fork over their ability to make choices for themselves to the government? Why does the President think that it is his duty to make decisions for us? Is it because we can't think for ourselves? Does he think I don't know that being a stay-at-home mom generates zero income? Believe me, I know what it means to live on one income. My husband and I made the choice together, as the best option for our family. I understand this speech was about how women can be a valuable asset to the workforce.  I get that.  I am an adult with a college degree in education, one of Washington's favorite stomping (c...

When warm weather hits, I like to open the screened windows and let some fresh air blow through the house.  This is my version of spring or fall cleaning.  Let some of those dust particles float right outside, replacing the stale funk of closed-up house with that crisp, fresh outside smell. I also love bed sheets that have been air dried in the sun. Best of all, I love to air out my children.  When the weather has been rainy and cold and we've been stuck inside for days on end, we tend to get tired of each other.  The children are constantly bickering and picking at each other...and crying because so-and-so took such-and-such... When warm weather hits, we spend as much time outside in the sunshine as possible.  Boosting our vitamin D levels from the sunshine probably helps, but more than that, I think playing in wide-open spaces boosts our spirits. The weather man predicted that Tuesday was the last day of warm weather - perhaps for the year in our part ...