Let Dads Be Dads (Part Two)

I recall my husband's first adventure with our daughter - he wanted to take her away for a few hours to give me a break and show her off to his best friend.  I packed up the diaper bag and prepared a bottle, clicked her snugly in her carseat, then kissed them both goodbye.  I cried.  I know, sappy - but it was the first time since the day she was born that we'd been separated.  I prayed for their safety - I couldn't have the two people I cared most about in the world getting in a car accident.  It just wouldn't do!  I spent the next few hours washing laundry, catching up on dishes, and resting on the couch.  Something I hadn't done in months.  When he returned, he was shell shocked.  He said the baby was fine on the ride up, but began crying after his arrival and refused to take a bottle.  After a half hour of crying, neither of the men could hear each other, so he gave up and came home.  Defeated.  Discouraged.

But I was so glad he tried!

I knew a big reason for the baby's meltdown was that she wasn't used to a bottle and she was hungry.
 
When she was a week or two old, I asked my husband to give her a bottle a day.  He replied that he didn't see a need to do that.  He's a very logical person.  Why would I need to give her a bottle when  you are right here?

Problem #1 - I nursed her exclusively.
Solution #1 - We needed to practice bottle feeding her.

Problem #2 - I was "The Source of All Comfort" when the baby was upset.
Solution #2 - We needed to give dad more time with baby girl, especially when crying.

We began small and have worked our way up over time.  First, daddy put her to bed every other night.  Second, I would go shopping by myself once in a while.  Third, he would take her shopping with him when he ran errands.  Small but important steps.

Today, we have three beautiful children and all of them think daddy rocks!  He builds Legos with them, and watches cool stuff with them like Batman, Superman, the Lego movie.  We still take turns putting the kids to bed every night.  Some weekends, he takes the whole gang to his parents' house for a visit and I have a whole day to myself.  Usually, I spend the entire day running errands and accomplishing tasks that are difficult to do with three children present.

If I had never given some of the "control" - some of the parenting responsibilities to my husband, I might still be complaining about how little my husband helps with the kids.  I have come to realize that dad doesn't do things like mom does.  He's not supposed to.  So what if their clothes don't match, they're eating donuts and their hair is standing on end?  They are dressed, fed, and happy.  It's a much happier world when we let them do their thing their way.  Let dads be dads.

Psalm 127:3 "Children are a heritage from the Lord, offspring a reward from him."