Let Dads Be Dads (Part One)
Overheard, "I could never leave my children at home with my husband for more than an hour - I don't know what I would return to."
Similar quotes have been overheard at mom's groups, in passing conversation, at Walmart - everywhere. I was one of "those" moms - the kind that don't trust their husbands with their children. Especially when our children were infants.
When I was the sole source of nourishment for my baby, and comfort and entertainment - I was indispensable. My husband worked two jobs when our first child was born. I rarely saw him, and my child saw him less than I. By the time she was two years old, our little girl refused to let daddy put her to bed because he was a virtual stranger. She did not know him. She did not trust him.
Nor did I trust him in his parenting skills, because those were untested waters. I fed, bathed and dressed her, read to her, went on walks together - we were each other's lives in those first few years. My husband works diligently to support us and provide for us. I love him for being our provider! At that time, his willingness to work two jobs enabled me to stay at home and nurture our daughter - but it crippled his relationship with her. When this rift came to light, I knew it was time to make some changes. I loved this man I married, and I wanted him to have an active role in parenting our daughter.
How could I help him embrace his role as "dad" in our child's life?
I again refer to Romans 12:3, particularly, "Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought..." - my first step was to admit I had a problem.
I was Provider Number Uno, the Magnifique, Marvelous Mama who had a set routine, pre-chosen foods, pre-set books to read, permanent nap times, set bath times, and no room for deviation. It was time to change.
Time to shake things up. Time to let dad take the reigns. Time to butt out.
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